I have a less-than-super power!

I am a S.L.I.der. I have been one for several years now. It all started when I noticed that street lights would turn off when I drove under them. I didn't think anything of it, but it started happen more and more frequently. Sometimes it would be three or four lights in a row. My wife thought I was imagining it at first until we were riding in the car together and several went out in one trip. I asked my older brother (who is an electrical engineer) about it and got a vague explanation about light reflecting off of my glasses or windshield and hitting the sensor on the street light.

Like the majority of S.L.I.ders I am unable to control it. So if you want a street light to go out you will have better luck talking to the Headmaster of Hogwarts than to a S.L.I.der.



Like other S.L.I.ders I have a few side effects from it. My bank card sometimes doesn't work and wearing a battery operated watch is out. It took me a while to realize this. I just thought my watch batteries were all retarded.

Light bulbs are always going out at my house, even the long life florescent ones. With a long life light bulb, I am lucky if it will work for 6 months. Before those light bulbs came along, we had to change them ALL THE TIME.

I guess I should consider myself fortunate that my SLIder tendancies aren't as bad as some. Some people have it strong enough that merely walking past an electronic toy can turn the toy on. Yeah, freaky, I know.

I think that the worst part of being a S.L.I.der is getting shocked by things. I am always getting zapped by cars, metal things, electronics, and people. It wouldn't be so bad if it was a light shock like when you scuff you feet on the carpet in woolly socks and touch the doorknob. No, these shocks hurt! Often my hand or arm aches afterwards for several minutes.

I can sometimes see the sparks jumping from my fingers. Not just little flashes either, we're talking Jacob's Ladder size sparks. I had a lady tell me once that my internal energy needs to be realigned. I wonder if I can get them focused so I can use it at will, though I will only use my powers for good or for awesome.

Unlike this guy.




More like this one.
Well, until I harness my powers I'll just have to deal with it. You'll find me in the electronics section rubbing my arm.

My daughter played the part of an atomic bomb

Cutesy Buttons had her 4 year check up today. This means that she got four booster shots in preperation for starting school next year. She was a little confused when we told her that she had to go get shots at the doctor. "I don't want to die," she said. "No, sweetie. You are not getting shot. You are getting a shot." we explained that it was medicine so she wouldn't get sick and that afterwards she would get a Slurpee. That made things sound really good. She was so happy all though her exam as the measured, weighed and poked at her. Then the nurses came in with the shots. We had her lay on the exam table and I held her arms over her head. The whole time she was so happy go lucky. The nurses prepared like they were dismantling a bomb. It was just like that scene in Armegeddon where the dismantle the nuke before the government can blow it up. Each nurse had two needles and a leg, along with cotten swabs and wipes. One nurse even counted down from twenty. Before she got to zero Cutesy Buttons had four shots and bandages on both legs and was screaming at the top of her lungs. I am sure that she was thinking we had betrayed her, but by the time we got to 7-eleven she had calmed down enough to pick out a cherry Slurpee and the world was saved. At least as far as she is concerned.